A fat, jolly squire
From Gooningtonshire
Desired himself a young wife
So his friends all conspired
They searched and inquired
To find him a good match for life
Swains well-admired
Dressed up to inspire
But he pictured none as a bride
No one knew he desired
And only perspired
F0r goodmaidens sufficiently wide
– sourced from Glijmo Yoll’s Goon Scrolls which were discovered in 1966 along the CĂ´te Sauvage, Poitou-Charentes in France. Translated from Goonspeak to English by Aamer Belkins-Dunjhab.Â