High Fidelity Castro: Top 5 Worst Tributes

Quick note: I know I said on air that I would drop dead before listening to anything by Bebe Qissis but my 2nd cousin Maia is 11 and she likes dancing to Dance Crazy (Just For Me Boi). So….that happened. It’s still bad and terrible but  11 year olds dig that shit. I’ma have to steal her from my auntie and send her to music High Fidelity Castro bootcamp but I’ll wait until she’s outta pigtails. Okay, onto the actual music newzzzz….

Top 5 Worst Tribute Albums of the Year. Reverse order as usual, punks!

5. Grover and Grover. Seriously, guys? Grover covered their OWN debut album. It’s listenable I guess but I’m not sure that society actually benefited from this. Way to go, selling more albums, jerkwads.

4. Applecore Delilah Marquette is an okay singer song writer but her new album is preeeeeeetty bad. It’s all covers of Fiona Apple songs (one of Marquette’s biggest influences) but reworked into emopunk ballads of epic lameness. Delilah needs to just commit to her cute-as-a-button routine. This was embarrassing.

3. Finger Puppets didn’t cover a whole album. They just did a tribute to Visions of You by Labor DistrictStill awful enough to make this list. Sorry guys but tambourines have a time and a place.

2. Jeannie Monster. Popstar Jeannie (or as I like to call her, Pop Store Jeannie) is a bore-tastic mainstream slutstream and it hurts to hear her slur all over legendary Gaga’s discopop hits from the early 00s. Lady G’s contemporaries thought  she was a whoretastic bitch but listening to Jeannie’s version is like re-inventing the vomit wheel.

(And for real, everyone needed to stop doing covers of Gagas after Lilo & Bitch made Ro-Ma-Ma the master remix of the century in 2029. I never get tired of plugging this even though it’s ancient news.)

and the number 1 worst Tribute album of the year goes to….

1. Bacon Mozzarella’s tribute to Hyacinth. Hyacinth was way underground until the late 2030s before they BLEW THE FUCK UP and rapidly redefined the jazzy drops on metallic hip hop. But Bacon Mozzarella’s cover is just 8 shitty cottail tracks. Nothing added to the original songs, just a jacked noise experiment.  I’m not saying there’s no such thing as a good noise cover but these guys didn’t do it. And they kind of made it worse by tributing one of the best bands of the past 25 years. F is for Failure.

Don’t forget to tune into Luscious 102.4 FM Thursdays @ 4pm for more music and Yours Truly, High Fidelity Castro.

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