gifts my enemies gave me

gifts my enemies gave me:

money; war; a keen sense of the ironic, you know

but also blankets, mugs, a spice rack

that over-the-door hanging shoe pocket thing

a coffee maker

a tassel from graduation ceremony

6 albums

that every single one of you left behind

including that one from the dead one

a lifetime of bad dreams

a taste for scented tabacco

one of those dumb alternative indie band shirts that i hate

but i wear it when i’m cleaning

ironing out the creases

and listening to techno, fuck you

i left you and you left the entire fucking solar system

did you hear Jeff Bezos tried it too?

what a goddamn poser, right?

oh my god you’d be laughing

and spearing me with some latest unlistenable track

that turns into yesterday’s new music

your chin jutting out below a halo of

curling black locks

your wild stupid hair

that every single person made fun of

and you liked it

because it made you different

more different than the heroin

thanks, by the way,

and sorry to be, like, so obvious,

or whatever

but your mom didn’t even cry at the funeral

maybe she didn’t want to even give you the satisfaction

would you?

didn’t you feel how much we all wanted you

beckoning against the traffic

sweating it out anew that you’ve crossed over and we’re all just stuck here waiting

down and out and trapped in a maze on the 405

and it’s hard

it’s hard for us

you sore loser

why didn’t you call me before you did it?

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